wait...
[[[things started so sudden/they ended so fast
are we afraid of the future or scarred from the past
rearranging everything - changed my life from what I knew following something I felt inside; that seemed too good to be true.
.surprise.
you filled part of me with hope then you clouded it with doubt//
words are finally turning from chaos...yet I still can't quite spit them out.
.get it out.
so many things I'm left wanting to say
hope, guilt, hurt&pride all blocking the way
confusion to no end..still causing so much pain
the hurtful realization that life's still one sick game
hypocrisy-
&clearly-fogged sense of bad direction.
reminding me why these dumb hearts are in need of such protection
what I saw as real&true&bliss-an unsuspected blazing fire.
was the disillusion of nothing at all/false hope&fake desire.
you'll find what you're looking for but no doubt it'll be untrue
someone again will fall in love with what they think is you.
I fell for something/nothing...not sure what part was real
&although the scars are permanent the wounds will always heal.
words&feelings twisted with meaning&it's behind them where I hid.
get it yet? I doubt it... good, me neither - never did
so,like an imprint in the sand washed away by the unsuspected tide. I'll keep the hope&guilt&hurt safely covered with this dumb pride.
I'm asking to be removed from your disarranged bottom shelf
where you remain in perfect harmony with your not so perfect self.
yes.I'll keep on keeping on, permanently on defense... in hopes that maybeeventuallyhopefully someday ............something will make sense.]]]
...im fine..just so you know..things are great
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